he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize