She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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