They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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