Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
this just has baby written all over it
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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