apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
