Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
