I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
