Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
