My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
