that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
