Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
