Jerry, you need to find god
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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