I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
