i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize
