Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
