Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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