So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
