im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
what day is it and did you see me today?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
