Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
