I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
barbara walters just said penis...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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