Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
