brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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