just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
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Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
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On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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