Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin

  (253): View more from Washington

  was*

  (509): View more from Washington

  True, R.I.P.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin (253): was* (509): True, R.I.P. http://tfl.nu/u2pm
  Replies (19) Good night (1179) Bad night (2415)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened? http://tfl.nu/sf3c
  Replies (23) Good night (4659) Bad night (1333)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend http://tfl.nu/ha54
  Replies (6) Good night (3044) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock." http://tfl.nu/14j8
  Replies (2) Good night (1563) Bad night (2934)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO http://tfl.nu/kxn2
  Replies (6) Good night (1898) Bad night (795)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control. http://tfl.nu/cnqj
  Replies (18) Good night (2351) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget. http://tfl.nu/qqak
  Replies (9) Good night (512) Bad night (1614)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  did she buy you pizza?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around. (215): did she buy you pizza? http://tfl.nu/k5jd
  Replies (9) Good night (2339) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic http://tfl.nu/pi8f
  Replies (0) Good night (1189) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award. http://tfl.nu/a9wc
  Replies (3) Good night (943) Bad night (1017)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me. http://tfl.nu/rhi7
  Replies (3) Good night (1960) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!" http://tfl.nu/68n8
  Replies (3) Good night (520) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe. http://tfl.nu/1u5h
  Replies (12) Good night (2798) Bad night (507)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age..... http://tfl.nu/e96s
  Replies (2) Good night (333) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well. http://tfl.nu/9225
  Replies (2) Good night (281) Bad night (473)

Randomize