my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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