How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
FUCK WHALES
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
