I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
