none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I have already put on my inside pants.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
