I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize