she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
