just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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