We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize
