I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
