nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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