I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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