the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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