Just mADE A PArabola og urine
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
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For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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