just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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