ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
