just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Found your dick twin last night
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
