Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music

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(314): View more from Missouri

Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?

(1-314): View more from Missouri

God gave us a 4 year grace period.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.

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25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(905): View more from Ontario

Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.

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(812): View more from Indiana

She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.

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(+61): View more from Australia

Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to

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(239): View more from Florida

Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.

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