I wannas sexs uuuuu
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
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