PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
