Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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