My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
