addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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