all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
