got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize