His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
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