return my video game
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
